The Purple Light: 7 Painful Signs You Are Being Taken for Granted in a Relationship

Friday, July 12, 2024

7 Painful Signs You Are Being Taken for Granted in a Relationship

By Sherrie Hurd, A.A.

learning-mind.com

Posted on July 12, 2024

No one deserves to be taken for granted. Unfortunately, situations arise where one person uses the other, so it’s smart to recognize the signs.

Have you ever wondered if another person was taking you for granted? Well, the truth is, if you’re wondering about it, chances are, it’s probably true.

Sometimes people ignore and neglect others unknowingly, but some do it intentionally. You see, some individuals care more about what you can do for them than you as a person.

Signs you’re being taken for granted

Some may notice that they are being taken for granted right away. This is true for many who’ve been in unhealthy and toxic relationships before. For those who aren’t aware at first, there are several painful signs that you are being taken for granted.

In many cases, the victims who feel used may not notice what’s happening. This is usually due to initial love-bombing. I can attest to that, as I didn’t have a clue what love bombing was until I was victimized. But, after a while, the signs started to add up. My partner didn’t really care about me the way they professed.

1. Selfishness

We can all be selfish sometimes, and that’s okay. But when you’re being taken for granted, you’ll notice that the person you thought was in your corner only reached out to you when they needed something.

It may feel like you’re wanted and needed at that moment, but over time, you’ll understand the truth. Pay attention to whether they want to spend time with you or if there are other motives. This reveals their true intentions.

2. Lack of appreciation

One sign of a healthy relationship is showing appreciation for one another. The lack of support in a friendship or relationship is a sign that something is wrong.

It could indicate that you’re being taken for granted by someone you care about. What makes this difficult to notice is having low self-esteem. If you struggle to appreciate yourself, it’s easier for others to take advantage of you.

3. Boundary disrespect

Let’s talk about boundaries. These are your personal property lines that protect who you are and what you stand for – even protection against things you’d rather not tolerate.

One sign that you’re being taken for granted is when a friend or partner constantly pushes against your boundaries. This is a red flag that this person does not respect you. They’re probably using you and attempting to manipulate your basic beliefs and standards.

4. Little involvement

In a relationship where you’re being taken for granted, there will be little involvement from your partner. They won’t really be that interested in your achievements or your goals. They also will not care about whether you’re involved in their lives either.

They’ve become so accustomed to your background existence in their life, so they just assume that the things you do aren’t important. They just assume you’ll always be around, and what you do or what you enjoy is no concern of theirs.

5. They do not pull their weight

You’ll know that you’re being taken for granted when your partner doesn’t seem to put in the same amount of work. Also, when you seem to be paying most of the bills and the majority of the appointments, this is another sign.

In a healthy relationship, each partner strives to take on an equal amount of responsibilities. Do you always pay for things? Are you always the one to clean and cook? If so, these are signs that your partner could indeed be taking you for granted.

6. You are not a priority

They may be your priority, but if you are being taken for granted, you are not their priority. And yes, your partner has a life and many other things of importance to intend to.

But if you aren’t at the top of that list, then something is wrong. They’re not keeping commitments, they’re constantly canceling dates and other important events. It’s just clear that your needs don’t matter to them. They have other priorities that they’ve set above you.

7. Nothing is good enough

One sign you will notice over time is that nothing you do is ever good enough for them. Even if everyone else notices your achievements and improvements, they will downplay these good things.

You see, it’s not in their best interests for you to have the spotlight. People who manipulate others in this manner are only interested in their accomplishments and goals.

Always recognize your worth

Not to sound self-centered or anything, but choose yourself and take care of yourself first. That’s right. How can you recognize nefarious actions if you cannot love yourself correctly, which includes putting your needs first? Without proper self-love, the things toxic people say will sound true.

Also, you cannot properly love another person without first loving yourself, including learning to recognize a lack of appreciation.

So, take these signs and adjust accordingly. You deserve that.

Featured image by freepik

Sherrie Hurd

About the author:

Sherrie Hurd, A.A.

Staff writer at Learning Mind
Sherrie Hurd is a professional writer and artist with over 20 years of experience. As a survivor of childhood trauma and multiple types of abuse, she is an advocate for mental health awareness. Sherrie manages multiple mental illnesses, including anxiety disorder, bipolar disorder, and PTSD. With this background and personal experience, she strives to help others overcome trauma and abuse, cope with mental illness, and heal over time.

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